At night, everything seems sweeter. I don’t mean the night blooming jasmine sweet. I mean that thoughts of my kid who I got aggravated with for not going to sleep, fades into the fact that every moment with her is a treasure. A “like” on a quote that I shared from a friend that is supportive no matter what I say or do, means the world. The day that had me worried about how I am going to make a living turns into a night of soaking in the tub and devouring a good novel.
Nighttime can on the other hand cause my mind to go awry as well. Worry runs rampant. Desperation over mistakes with lost loves comes to mind sometimes too often. Sleep doesn’t come when it needs to. Fear rules my brain and prevents me from catching winks.
But the nights when sweet nostalgia and romanticizing mundane events, allow me to rest ever so peacefully. I get out of the tub and blow out the candles and thank God for the fact that I am here on this earth. I push back my body issues. I temporarily ignore my financial woes and love the hell out of life. Maybe part of it is the autumn that I love so much. Or the fact that I have caught up a bit on much needed sleep.
No matter, I am hoping that I have more nights like this. Nights when I want to reach out to old classmates. Times when I can be so happy that I am exactly where I need to be and fully accept it. Moonlit evenings that allow me to love who I am and doubt those who do not know how beautiful I am. On these nights, I welcome twilight with an open hand in the way that I do when I hold onto a mug of hot cocoa after hours of playing in the snow with my daughter.
Nostalgia and nighttime, great bedfellows. At least for now…